It was 2 years ago today that this little bundle was placed in my arms and I thought, "oh, so you mean I actually take him with me...." I always knew that being pregnant equaled having a baby in the end but it didn't really seep in until I was actually holding him and realized that I had no clue what I was doing. I am so thankful for these past 2 years, that in all reality feel like they have just been my whole life. This little man has opened my eyes to a whole new world, he has taught me things about myself and others that I would have never seen with my own eyes, he has shown me what life is really about.
One of the most important things that Cade has taught me is to trust myself. When we first brought him home we had a really hard time getting him to eat. I now look back and laugh at those few short moments that felt like a life time because the answer was so simple but yet so foreign. During those early days I was terrified to be alone with him... "what if he cried and I didnt know what to do?" "What if he spit up a funny color and I didn't know how to take care of it?" "What if he made a noise that was important but I didn't pick up on it?" All so silly, yet they were so real. However, once my mom talked some sense into me, about 1oo times, I realized that I knew more instinctively than I thought I did, simply because he was my baby and I was his Mama. It has been fascinating these past few years to see how you some how figure it out. You might not be right the first, second, or even the third time but you eventually figure it out and they still love you. I learned after many agonizing days that I needed to read the books and listen to advice but then throw the books out and file away the advice and allow my new read learnings to work around what was best for us instead of the other way around.
I have also learned that life is messy, and that is okay. When he was a little guy I prided myself on always having him in unspattered clothes, with a clean face and combed hair.... and then he turned 1. Now, don't get me wrong, I like him to be clean and I dont let him run around with a booger nose but if there is a remnant of lunch on his shirt, thats okay, everyone will know that his mom feeds him. If his hair is messy when we are running errands, thats okay, everyone will know that his mom is letting him be independent. If he has dirt under his fingernails and on his knees when we are playing at the park, that is okay, everyone will know that he is having a fun time. Being messy goes hand in hand with being a boy, or maybe with being a toddler, but I at least know that it just adds a little "character" to life.
Cade has taught me how to love. I never knew that my heart had the capacity to love as much as I love him. He is such a gentle little soul with so much goodness that twinkles in his eyes. I honestly remember when I was pregnant being worried that I wouldn't "love the baby." As silly as it sounds, it was a real fear of mine. However, the moment that I saw him and he grabbed a hold of my little finger I knew that he was one of the greatest gifts I would ever receive. Last night when I was putting him to bed I couldnt help but relive that memory and smile to myself because not only do I love this little man deeply, I love him more than I could have ever imagined.
I think that one of the most important things that I have learned while being a mom is to laugh. Life is not as serious as I like to think that it needs to be sometimes. I have learned that when the lunch is thrown on the floor, you need to laugh. When the water is spilled all over the car seat as well as the Sunday dressed child, you need to laugh. When a ball is hit with a little more force than you expected out of a toddler and accidentally hits a picture, you need to laugh. When you walk into the bathroom and the floor is covered with water and bubbles that started out in the tub, you need to laugh. Now the toddler doesnt always have to SEE the laugh but it makes the mom much happier. Lessons always need to be taught and can be, even if there is a smile on your face. I am definitely not perfect and tend to err on the upset side but I have found time and time again life is happier, easier, and healthier when you laugh, and for some reason, the little ones remember better when mom laughs.
So, thank you my little man. For being such a good boy, bringing so much joy and happiness into our home and being such a light. Daddy and I love you so very much and are so thankful for who you are and who you are becoming. Happy Birthday little one!
One of the most important things that Cade has taught me is to trust myself. When we first brought him home we had a really hard time getting him to eat. I now look back and laugh at those few short moments that felt like a life time because the answer was so simple but yet so foreign. During those early days I was terrified to be alone with him... "what if he cried and I didnt know what to do?" "What if he spit up a funny color and I didn't know how to take care of it?" "What if he made a noise that was important but I didn't pick up on it?" All so silly, yet they were so real. However, once my mom talked some sense into me, about 1oo times, I realized that I knew more instinctively than I thought I did, simply because he was my baby and I was his Mama. It has been fascinating these past few years to see how you some how figure it out. You might not be right the first, second, or even the third time but you eventually figure it out and they still love you. I learned after many agonizing days that I needed to read the books and listen to advice but then throw the books out and file away the advice and allow my new read learnings to work around what was best for us instead of the other way around.
I have also learned that life is messy, and that is okay. When he was a little guy I prided myself on always having him in unspattered clothes, with a clean face and combed hair.... and then he turned 1. Now, don't get me wrong, I like him to be clean and I dont let him run around with a booger nose but if there is a remnant of lunch on his shirt, thats okay, everyone will know that his mom feeds him. If his hair is messy when we are running errands, thats okay, everyone will know that his mom is letting him be independent. If he has dirt under his fingernails and on his knees when we are playing at the park, that is okay, everyone will know that he is having a fun time. Being messy goes hand in hand with being a boy, or maybe with being a toddler, but I at least know that it just adds a little "character" to life.
Cade has taught me how to love. I never knew that my heart had the capacity to love as much as I love him. He is such a gentle little soul with so much goodness that twinkles in his eyes. I honestly remember when I was pregnant being worried that I wouldn't "love the baby." As silly as it sounds, it was a real fear of mine. However, the moment that I saw him and he grabbed a hold of my little finger I knew that he was one of the greatest gifts I would ever receive. Last night when I was putting him to bed I couldnt help but relive that memory and smile to myself because not only do I love this little man deeply, I love him more than I could have ever imagined.
I think that one of the most important things that I have learned while being a mom is to laugh. Life is not as serious as I like to think that it needs to be sometimes. I have learned that when the lunch is thrown on the floor, you need to laugh. When the water is spilled all over the car seat as well as the Sunday dressed child, you need to laugh. When a ball is hit with a little more force than you expected out of a toddler and accidentally hits a picture, you need to laugh. When you walk into the bathroom and the floor is covered with water and bubbles that started out in the tub, you need to laugh. Now the toddler doesnt always have to SEE the laugh but it makes the mom much happier. Lessons always need to be taught and can be, even if there is a smile on your face. I am definitely not perfect and tend to err on the upset side but I have found time and time again life is happier, easier, and healthier when you laugh, and for some reason, the little ones remember better when mom laughs.
So, thank you my little man. For being such a good boy, bringing so much joy and happiness into our home and being such a light. Daddy and I love you so very much and are so thankful for who you are and who you are becoming. Happy Birthday little one!
6 comments:
That is THE sweetest post I've read all day! All I can say is ditto (in regards to my boy, and I wish I could have said things as beautifully as you have now when it was his birthday a couple of days ago...). You're an amazing woman, mother and wife my friend. And what a sweet, loving and lucky boy you have there. Happy birthday Cade-man!!!
So neat. He is lucky to have such a sweet mom!
so cute lacey! i loved reading that post! happy birthday to your little man!
I can't wait to be a mom!
Lacey you make being a mom so wonderful. You are such a good mom and our little Cade is so lucky to have you for a mom. Keep up the good work, you are a good teacher for us all.
Love,
GM
Ahhhh Lacey Anne (pronounced Annie),
I love you. You have learned so well. The lessons of life involving our children bring us our greatest learning. I know this because you constantly are teaching me. What a tender, patient, and loving mommie you are. I can see why your babies (earthly and heavenly) choose YOU to be their mom! How please our Father in Heaven must be of you! Our Father considers his children His greats gifts also...as you honor his children (your children) you honor Him.
I love you so VERY much,
Mom
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