The Journey

Thank you everyone who have been so sweet to me. Over the past couple of days I have quickly remembered that life just isn't THAT hard. It is so funny to me how easily we can get caught up in the thick of thin things and quickly become overwhelmed, I am the queen of that! So, to all of you reading at this moment I can quickly say that I am MUCH better, work is MUCH better (I am actually kind of liking it) and everything has fallen into place.
You can feel free to stop reading at this moment because although this is a blog and is posted for all to see I too use this as my journal. So, if you really want all the insights to my soul, keep reading, if not you can click on by and come back another day.
I am so thankful for my life, my experiences, my family, my friends. It has been so interesting to take a deep look into myself and into my past lessons. Growing up I was always so afraid, afraid of being wrong, afraid of not doing something right, afraid that I would fail, just afraid. It saddens me to now see how long I allowed fear to guide my actions. I always knew that Heavenly Father was there and that I was not alone. I always knew that I needed to lean on Him and everything would be okay. I always knew that what my parents taught me about the Lord was true. I always knew that, but that was the problem, my mind knew but my heart hadn't gotten there yet. I know that I have come a long way on my journey but I also see the path continuing on in front of me. But this is what I have allowed my mind and my heart to agree upon along the way...
1. I know that I have the decision as to whether I am going to be afraid or not. Things can be overwhelming, things can be difficult, things can be hard but being afraid only makes them worse. It is a lot of work sometimes to chase the fear away and it takes a great deal of faith to turn the fear over to our Father in Heaven but that is all for a reason. We need to learn how to Surrender our will over to our Heavenly Father how to give away the anxiety, how to throw out the doubts, how to allow faith to fill the hole that fear has created. It is so liberating and empowering when you realize that something has "hurt" but you were able to talk with the Lord about it and that you do not have to carry it alone.
2. I have learned that once you try to do it all on your own, you never have enough. Enough time, enough energy, enough desire. But once you are able to allow the Lord to help, the possibilities are endless. Everything was not meant to be done all at once or all by yourself. There is no joy in doing that way. One day at a time.
3. I have learned time and time again that there are so many angles that have been placed in each of our lives. These angels are there to buoy us up and comfort us in times of need. These angels are the ones that not only listen to the spirit but follow his promptings. Thanks again Emily!
4. I have learned that if we pray for courage that Lord provides opportunities for us be courageous. If we pray for humility, the Lord provides opportunities for us to be humble. If we pray for patience, the Lord provides opportunities for us to be patient. The Lord isn't going to just "hand over" godly traits and characteristics. He is going to teach us what they are, how they can help us, and how to use them. He is going to provide opportunities for us to develop characteristics not just open them up and use them. I think that many times we think that when we start doing the "right" thing or start really trying to become "better" that for some reason it gets harder, as if we are being "punished" or "held back." Honestly, I think that it DOES get harder but for a different reason. It gets harder because we are learning something new. We are stretching our old paradigms and broadening our horizons. We are learning how to be like God and that isn't EASY. But it does get easier the longer we practice and the more diligent we are.
I am so thankful for my journey and honestly look forward to the path that is continuing on. Thank you to everyone who has taught me, loved me, helped me, and allowed me to stumble, fall, get back up and try again because that is how we really learn who we are and how much God loves us.